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I’m down to just shy of 4 months till I quit my job of 11 years and walk away from the only security I’ve every known.  As it gets closer to reality it’s  a bit scare to be honest.  Not scary enough not to do, but scare still the same.  As I weigh the pros and cons, reviewing the list I made a year ago when I first set my mind to do this they’ve stayed pretty much the same.

To be honest, the pros have increased and the cons diminished.  I used to think, can’t you just do 10 more years and get that retirement?  Can’t you just deal and hang on?  I realize more and more every day that I can’t.  So really the only thing that concerns me at this point is my health and the insurance issue.

Being diagnosed a diabetic makes it a little more complicated.  I’m hoping that I can get myself in better shape, maybe lose 100 pounds of baggage and possibly do away with the Diabetes all together.  That would be good since without insurance I won’t be able to afford the medication.  It’s $400 a month just for the pills, that’s rent.  And that doesn’t include the testing supplies.  Hopefully I’ll be able to kick it into gear here soon, cause so far I haven’t been able to find the motivation.  Knowing me, it won’t come till I actually leave and have no choice on the matter.

The only other thing that concerns me is the fact that financially, I’m a little behind the curve of where I wanted to be now and when I leave.  Those damn greedy prima donna’s in the NBA are wreaking havoc with my finances.  With the NBA lockout, and those selfish bastards not willing to split profit’s 50-50 with the owners I’m out thousands of dollars.  If they don’t work, I don’t work at AT&T.  It’ll put me a few grand behind, but I’m not going to extend it any further.  March 29th will be my last day, if not sooner.  But not later.

Which makes me think of something funny.  I’ve told damn near everyone that I’m leaving at the end of March.  I did that on purpose because there is no way I’ll tell everyone I’m going to leave and then change my mind.  I’d look like an asshat.  I work best when; as my grandmother used to say; sometimes the best choice is no choice at all.  But how funny would it be to show up April 1st, ready to work and be like “APRIL FOOLS!!!”

Not gonna happen, but it would be funny none the less.

129Days 10Hours 55minutes left till my last day here.