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O Canada! Our home and native land! True patriot love in all thy sons command. With glowing hearts we see thee rise, The True North strong and free! From far and wide, O Canada, We stand on guard for thee. God keep our land glorious and free! O Canada, we stand on guard for thee. O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

Ô Canada! Terre de nos aïeux, Ton front est ceint de fleurons glorieux! Car ton bras sait porter l’épée, Il sait porter la croix! Ton histoire est une épopée Des plus brillants exploits. Et ta valeur, de foi trempée, Protégera nos foyers et nos droits Protégera nos foyers et nos droits.

The Canadian border snuck up on me actually.  As far as I recall, outside the border with Mexico there are signs that you are approaching the border.  And there was a parking lot where you could stop if you wanted to walk across the border or just needed to dump out the last of your stash prior to crossing. With Canada there’s no heads up.  One minute you’re cruising at 75 MPH, then you see a sign saying reduce speed ahead then whamo, you’re at the border.  Problem is, that I have all my paperwork in a watertight box in the lugaage carrier on the roof of my vehicle.  I intended to take it out the last stop prior to getting to the border.  There was no last stop.  When I explained to the guy that my paperwork was in the roof carrier, he says, “interesting place for it considering you want cross the border.”  NICE!  He makes me pull over and go inside to show my paperwork and the most beautiful woman greets me at the counter.  She has black hair that is almost blue tied into a braid, and crystal blue eyes.  OMG, I’m moving to Canada.  She asks if I’m travelling alone, I respond “That depends on how many days off you can get.”  She’s not amused.  Damn border guards never have a sense of humor.

I go to the next guy to give him the papers that she gave me to give him and he asks where I’m from.  Texass I say.  And where are you going?  Calgary first.  “Ah,”  he says, “That’s the Texass of Canada.”  AWWW SHIT!

As I get on the road I can see what they are talking about.  This part of Canada is a lot like driving through north Texass.  It’s flat and there are miles of endless farms, fields and Prairie land.  The only difference is that it’s NOT Texass so it makes it better.  It’s also cooler up here and you can drive with your windows open.  Plus it’s Canada for Pete’s sake.

I pull into Calgary at 17:48 and fuel up real quick.  Then I go downtown to the hotel that was recommended to me.  It’s sold out.  She sends me to another hotel, which was sold out except for a $500 a night room if I want.  I think I’ll pass, thanks.  I start looping around down town and they were all sold out so I head south first and then to the Northeast based on the map of hotels I have.  When I get to a Hampton Inn, Jessica tells me she’s sold out too, but proceeds to call around for me.  None of the hotels in her area have a room.  I can’t believe this is happening again.  I guess I am sleeping in the car again.

Jessica says that Calgary is Always sold out during the week, it’s the weekends that are usually slow for them. Weird.  She says it’s cause of all the business conventions.  This week its the Calgary Film Festival.  She asks if I have tried Motel Village.  What’s that?  “It’s an entire block on the west side that is nothing but motels back to back and side by side.  Like 10 of them,” she says.  I say I have not and she calls the Quality Inn and they say that have 1 jacuzzi room left for $200.  “Whatever,” I think to myself, I need a shower and a bed so off I go.  When I get to the Quality Inn the counter guy asks, do you have a reservation?  No, I’m here for the Jacuzzi room.  Sorry, I just sold out.  WTF!  It’s those damn people in the minivan out front, I’m sure of it.  That’s it, I’m going to go out there and kick their asses!!!  What was that?  He repeats. ” The Super 8 still has rooms, I just called.”  With tires screeching I tear off to the Super 8 on the other side of the block.  What stop sign?  I didn’t see a stop sign.

When I get to the Super 8 I ask if they have a room and the nice, pretty, intelligent, well rounded and all-in-all extraordinary counter girl says YES.  Thank the Lord Almighty.  “Smoking or Non?” she asks me.  “Non please” I say.  “Sorry, all I have is smoking.”  WELL WHY F*%$ING ASK ME?!?!  Just say all I have is smoking is that OK.  I don’t care if there is someone currently in there smoking a Corn Cobb Friggin’ Pipe,  I am physically and mentally drained and I want to take a dang shower.  She says it’s a suite with an extra bedroom but she’ll give it to me for the regular room rate.  Spiffy, hurry the heck up or I’m going to take back all those nice things I said about you 9 sentences ago.

It is now 20:36, and I’ve been looking for a room for almost 3 hours.  This was my 19th stop, not including the one Jessica called for me.  I head in and don’t leave again till the morning.  (PS, it’s actually a nicer room then the one I had in Vegas.  AND, there was a sheet, a duvet AND a blanket on a comfy bed, unlike Vegas.

What-ah-ya-know!)

The next morning I partook of the “free” rolled-into-the-price-of-your-room-at-an-inflated-rate continental breakfast and checked out.  I exchanged some US currency for Canadian dollars, and man are they pretty. I didn’t get any five at the time (but you can Google it if you want to see it), but this is what they look like:

The coin on the bottom left is a $1 coin and the right is a $2 coin.  They don’t offer a bill for either.  A bit of interesting trivia is that except for the Canadian penny, all the other coins can be picked up with a magnet.  My friend Mark found that out about he quarter by accident and I tested all the others while here.

Anyways, When I commented to women at the bank how beautiful the money was, her response was, “Well at least your money is starting to get a bit of color, ay.”  That statement was kinda like when the first kid in gym class to get pubic hair says, “You’ll get yours soon enough.”  It makes you feel small, and maybe a bit dirty, but you can’t help but be excited at the possibilities…  The thing that did strike me was that I can remember as a kid, when my friend Michael Picciotti went to Canada with his father.  When he came back he gave me 5 Canadian quarters.  He said that if you give them 1 American dollar, this is what you.  20% more video games out of every dollar, how can you beat that!?!  The point I’m making is that when I exchanged $300 American today, I got $312 Canadian.  And at the restaurant during lunch, they receipt said the exchange rate was dollar for dollar.  The problem is not that the Loonie has strengthened, it’s that the Dollar has weakened.  Pretty soon we’ll have the same inflation rate as Zimbabwe (66,212%) and our money won’t be worth bollocks.  listen to me people, invest in the Euro!!!

I then drove downtown and parked in a nice parking garage, and then walked around Calgary.

Let me say that I REALLY, REALLY like Calgary.  It’s a small, big city but it had a good vibe to it and it was very, very clean.  Also, the sidewalks were not so overly crowded as to induce a panic attack due to claustrophobia.  There were several mass transit options including taxis, buses, light rail

(which is free through downtown itself (and on a sidebar is the same thing that San Antonians have repeatedly voted down), and one particular homeless guy selling piggy back rides for 50 cents.  I chose to walk.  I traveled through Stephens Avenue, which is several blocks where is street is closed off and it’s like an open mall area.  All the building are historic though most have been converted to modern stores and restaurants.  Every restaurant in Calgary; both on Stephens and every other street I walked; had outside seating areas.

I then walked over to the Calgary Tower.  This is the second tower I’ve been up on this trip, which considering I’m terrified of heights is kinda funny.

From  the top you have a beautiful view of the entire city and the Rockies in the distance.  I thought it was neat that some of the building around actually have their names on the roof so you can see where they are:

Also, they have a section that is a glass floor where you can stand on it and look straight down:

It made me pee a little.  While I was up there I also saw a large fountain in some kind of park.

When I came back down I went looking for it.  It’s the Olympic Park.  Created to commemorate when Calgary hosted the winter Olympics in 1988.  It had a great fountain and lawn areas around where people were having there lunch.  There was also great art pieces littering the grounds.

The fountain area itself was nice too

In fact, if art is your thing then walking through Calgary you’ll find it everywhere.  There are parks throughtout the city and they each have their own art displays.

Just Walking down the Street you find art on display

I also walked through Prince’s Island Park.  I don’t think they mean the pop artist Prince, formally known as the symbol formarly known as Prince, but you never know.  Was he Candaian?  Anyway, there is a river that runs through Calgary and there is an island in the middle of said river.  That is Prince’s Island Park

It is a beautiful and Lush park with tons of nature walking trails and bike paths.  It has several bridges to get to it

and it also has wonderful fountains and art displays

The last piece of 4 panels I found especially neat.  It was made up of Glass marbles sandwiched between 2 metal “mesh” panels if you will.  It was tactile, as you rubbed your hand across it the marbles spun.  Very well done.

There is also great animal life in the park including ducks and swans and sea gulls.  Yes you read that right, sea gulls

And there were these other birds that I though might be their species of crow, but then I saw crows.  Either way, they were pretty

The other neat thing up here is that the squirrels are all black

After enjoying the fountains

I went to China Town

Then I had something to eat at a neat little place

Afterward, I wandered through Calgary till the last possible minute.  I wanted to catch as much as I could,but eventually I did have to leave.  I loved the atmosphere and the people of Calgary.  I loved it’s big city charm with a small town attitude.  Everyone was exceptionally friendly.  But I had to leave because I wanted to make sure I had enough time for Winnipeg.

So with the Skyline of Calgary fading into the distance, I headed East.  I’ve got over 1300 Kilometers to cover…

READ EAST TO WINNIPEG HERE

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